The Day to End all Days
by Summing up the Stars
Summary: Rated for some langauge. Enzan's having a really bad day at work. Too bad Blues isn't helping matters.


Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
Title: The Day to End all Days  
  
Author: Summing up the stars  
  
Pairing: none really.  
  
Progress: one-shot  
  
Warning: OOC, Enzan having a *bad* day.  
  
// denotes thought ** emphasis  
  
~*****~  
  
Enzan Ijuin, the illustrious Vice president of IPC, shifted in his seat and, for the ninth time that day, prayed to whatever power that sat on high to materialize a virtual system before him. It didn't have to be anything fancy, just something that fall out of the sky and squish Ryan Baker.  
  
Normally, Enzan was not a person to ever wish physical harm upon anyone. In fact, the Vice president was a firm believer in treating his fellow man with nothing but reverence and respect, but at the same time, Enzan also felt that the old credence, "Behave to everyone as if you were receiving a great guest . . . do not do to others what you would not wish done to yourself," held true.  
  
Since the CEO deemed it suitable to torture the officials, or at least *him*, by holding what was now a four and a half hour meeting regarding the new name the of the newly created virtual system, a subject Enzan couldn't care less about, the vice president felt it was now his righteous civic duty to return the favor by obliterating the dumbass, if only to shut him up, with a virtual system, preferably with one of the new ones whose name were currently being debated . . . just to make a point regarding the sheer idiocy of this meeting.  
  
// That would be justice served. // Enzan thought to himself, // Saaaaa, Powers that Be, hear my prayer, at this point I'll settle for a hand grenade, or even a simple gun would do!! Hell, I'll be happy with a kitchen knife, or you people can always strike him with lightening...I don't care! Anything to shut him up! I WANT TO GO HOME!!! // Enzan sulked to himself.  
  
Ordinarily, Enzan would have never even considered attending a meeting like this. However, the memo his secretary had given to him had said that this meeting was "of the utmost importance" and that all high officials were to attend. The memo had not explicitly stated the topic to be discussed, but had *promised* that this gathering would be no more than an hour at most.  
  
When the Vice president had arrived at conference room and realized what all the hoop-la was about, he initially regarded this as a welcomed opportunity to just sit back, relax, and let his mind wander.  
  
Yet, when the designated one-hour meeting turned into two and then three hours, Enzan's contentment turned into impatience.  
  
The meeting had almost ended at one point, but when some young CEO suggested the name "Blue Thunder" as a name possibility for the new virtual system, the entire conference room erupted with outrage at the suggestion of a name that did not originate from the well.......original; and thus, the meeting continued with a heated debate, led by Ryan Baker, of the significance of traditional versus non-traditional names systems.  
  
"How can you suggest such a name?!!!" I STILL believe that VR-2 is the better name!" Ryan Baker yelled.  
  
"And your mother dropped you on your head as a child! Sit down old man! No one cares what you think!!! I think we should call the new systems Black Cactus!!!" a younger CEO shouted back.  
  
"Young man! You will speak when you are given permission to speak!" Ryan retorted. "Now, Takahashi-san, what is your opinion on this matter?"  
  
A grizzly looking man stood up. "Well, Baker-san, I believe there is a certain beauty in tradition . . . ."  
  
Realizing that this conference was not going end any time soon, but indeed continue for God only knew how much longer, Enzan Ijuin wanted to scream and cry. Instead, he sighed in self-pity and shifted in his chair.  
  
"Ano Enzan-sama, I didn't think anyone could fidget elegantly," Blues whispered to him from his PET, "but you've somehow managed to do it throughout this entire meeting ... will you *sit still?!* You're making me anxious!"  
  
"I can't help it!" Enzan hissed back, crossing his long legs. "I'm bored, I want to go home. I have *to go to the bathroom*!!!!!"  
  
"Haha," Blues quietly chuckled to his operator, "I *told* you not to drink that tea before this meeting ... but did you listen? Nooooooooo..... 'I'll be fine Blues,' you said. 'Don't make an issue over it Blues.' Now *who's* making an issue out of it? Hehehehehehe...."  
  
"Shut up Blues," Enzan snapped.  
  
Enzan felt a hard tap on his shoulder. Turning around, he came face to face with an annoyed elder CEO. "Will you two kindly be quiet?!" he hissed angrily to Enzan, "I cannot hear what is being said because of you two chatterboxes!"  
  
Now, ordinarily Enzan would have offered a diplomatic apology, but today had been an asinine day to say the least, and the vice president's well of patience and diplomacy had long since dried out.  
  
"Get bent!" Enzan retorted back.  
  
"Why I never!! You young people today! No manners! Absolutely none at all!" the elder muttered.  
  
"And you can bite me," Enzan replied matter-of-factly. Blues had to swallow a laugh.  
  
To see the *Great* Enzan Ijuin in such an openly frustrated state was extremely rare, and Blues' only qualm was that he could not manifest his amusement, given his present location.  
  
Enzan turned back around and crossed his arms, as well as his legs, a scowl etched into his elegant features.  
  
"Why Enzan-sama," Blues whispered, laughter clearly evident in his voice, "has anyone ever told you how kawaii you look when you when you pout?"  
  
Enzan turned a murderous look to his NAVI. "Blues...," he began, but was interrupted by loud banging sound, which silenced the two.  
  
"It has been decided. The name of the newly designed virtual system will be . . . 'Crimson Flash.' This meeting is adjourned," Ryan Baker announced a pained look on his face. He banged the gavel once more to indicate the official end of the meeting.  
  
"Free at last, free at last! Thank God almighty, I am free at last!" Enzan cried, leaping from his chair.  
  
Shaking his head, Blues tried to get Enzan's attention. "Enzan-sama, calm down! Remember where you are," Blues commented.  
  
"Don't tell me to calm down! You have no idea how...how...how *craptacular* this day has been. I was stuck in another meeting before this one, and do you *know* what that one was about? ... Whether the colors of PETS clash with the peoples clothes ... But *you* wouldn't know that, would you? You weren't there!" Enzan replied, his voice edged with a hint of hysteria, "Where were *you* Blues?! If I have to suffer through these damned meetings, then it is your duty as my NAVI to suffer with me!"  
  
"Enzan-sama," Blues said in a hushed tone, scanning around to see if anyone was looking at them "you have to *calm down*!"  
  
Enzan didn't here him, however and continued his rant. "Gods it was *SO BORING*! I had to keep checking my pulse to make sure I hadn't died of boredom. And then.....!!"  
  
"ENZAN-SAMA!" Blues seethed,. "Tell me about your day later, but right now, we, or actually *you*, have a problem ...."  
  
Enzan paused in mid-rant. "What?"  
  
Blues nodded toward a direction to his right. "I think Baker-san is looking for you for one of those post meeting discussions. If you *truly* want to be free, then may I suggest you make a strategic escape?"  
  
A look of pure panic washed over Enzan's face. "Oh *shit*!!!" Blues smirked, upon hearing the uncharacteristic swear from vice president Enzan Ijuin, who was currently scanning the room for a means of escape.  
  
The exit to the conference room was too far, Enzan knew he would never make it there before Ryan Baker could corner him . . . and there were no tall potted plants to hide behind ...  
  
// Dammit...// Enzan ran a hand through his two toned hair hair, mind reeling.  
  
"Ahhhh! Fine...then ... then let's stand REAL still, may be he won't notice we're here...." Enzan countered. Blues bit his bottom lip to keep from laughing aloud, but fine tremors shaking his shoulders gave him away to his operator.  
  
"What is *so* funny Blues?" Enzan asked as he glared to his NAVI.  
  
"I-I-It's just that, you are *always* so *calm*, *cool*, and *collected* Enzan-sama, it is really funny to see you get so visibly *exasperated*! ...." Blues giggled.  
  
"*Well* I am *so* glad that you find humor in my misery....If Rockman and Netto could see you now! " Enzan said annoyed, but was interrupted by a voice coming from behind him.  
  
"Ah! Ijuin-san! I was looking for you! I'm glad I found you!" Ryan called.  
  
"Oh *fuck me*!!" Enzan hissed to himself.  
  
A small snort of laughter escaped Blues this time, as he stepped center to make his presence known to the other CEO. "Ah! Baker-san! Enzan-sama was just telling me *how* badly he wanted to talk to you!" Blues exclaimed.   
  
// Blues!!! Omae O Koroso!(1) // Enzan screamed in his mind.  
  
Ryan smiled slightly. "Ijuin-san, Blues, this is Kato Takashi," the CEO said, indicating to the man who was standing to Ryan's right. Kato Takahashi stepped forward and handshakes were exchanged.  
  
"Ijuin-san, I have developed some theories regarding the schematics and creation of the virtual systems..." Ryan began.  
  
"And if I *begged*, would you share them with me?" Enzan replied, voice heavy sarcasm.  
  
Ryan, slightly taken aback by Enzan's tone of voice, took a step back. "Vice President?"  
  
"What Enzan-sama means," Blues interceded quickly, "is he would be just *honored* if you would share your ideas with him first hand. As we all know," Blues continued, "Enzan-sama is *very fond* of...uh....system talk. So it is only natural that he would, um, beg you to share your thoughts. Isn't that right Enzan-sama?"  
  
But Blues didn't give Enzan a chance to reply, and instead pushed forward. "So *please* share your ideas! ... But I, on the other hand, have something I must attend to....I ...uh....I....um...have to work on my cyber-cycle! (2)" Blues exclaimed loudly. "Yes, my cyber-cycle must be serviced. Wouldn't you know it, it the middle of battle, the operating system shut down! Just like that! Said that I had 'committed an illegal operation' or something, and just went....kaput! ...Boy was my face red...hahaha...." Blues rambled.  
  
"Blues...." Enzan began through clenched teeth, but Blues pretended not to hear.  
  
"So gentlemen, I assure you that my operator speaks on my behalf, and now, I must take my leave," Blues finished, bowing to the three men before him. With a slight smirk to Enzan, Blues logged onto the internet.  
  
Enzan's shoulders slumped in defeat as he watched Blues, wanting very badly to throttle him.  
  
// I'll get you for this Blues......//  
  
The vice president could only stand there, smiling and nodding, trying to feign interest as Ryan Baker prattled his ideas regarding the virtual systems. // Be quiet, old man......Shut Up!...Silence!!! Close sesame! ......Tais-toi tête de mert!!!(3) Silenzio!! (4) Você fecha sua boca!!! (5)......If I have to keep smiling like this, my face is going to crack into two......CIERRE SU BOCA!!!(6) // Enzan seethed inwardly. GODS ABOVE! He REALLY had to go to the bathroom now. It was then that Enzan realized that Ryan had stopped talking was looking at him expectantly. // Am I supposed to say something?...?//  
  
"Well Ijuin? Do you agree?" Ryan asked.  
  
"Oh yes, absolutely," Enzan replied almost immediately.  
  
Ryan Baker and Kato Takahashi stared at Enzan in disbelief. "Care to explain vice president?" Ryan asked.  
  
"Explain what?"  
  
"Explain why you think that the people's fascination with NAVI's is justified?"  
  
Enzan's mind reeled. "Because...because they are aesthetically pleasing to the eye."  
  
"Are you serious General? You actually notice things like this....about standard NAVI's?"  
  
Enzan hoped his facial expression mirrored insult. "But of course. I am an Ijuin, the vice president, it is in my blood to notice beauty in any form; as a NAVI battle operator, I am trained to observe all details of my surroundings," Enzan supplied. // I can't believe I'm saying this crap...this is SO lame...//  
  
"Are you implying that our custom NAVI's designed by our Chief Engineer Burton are ...ugly? For lack of a better term..." Kato asked, eyes narrowing to slits.  
  
Chief Engineer Burton, the head designer of all the worker custom NAVI's, was a decrepit, bitter old man. Unknown to Burton, picture close-ups of his wrinkled old face were used to reprimand problematic workers, none of whom had been able to stand to look at the hideous face for more than five minutes before screaming for mercy. It was the most effective method of punishment discovered by officials to straighten out insubordinate men.  
  
// Oh please......Burton wouldn't know beauty if it bit him on the ass...// Enzan thought to himself, but instead replied, "I didn't say that... though I will admit Chief Engineer Burton's designs are a bit...déclassé. I don't think it would hurt IPC any if our designs were a bit more, how shall I say it?....chic..."  
  
"Ijuin-san that is the most ridiculous notion I've ever heard! You can't possibly think..." Kato began, but Ryan cut him off.  
  
"I believe you have a point!" Ryan exclaimed, "If we redesigned our current models to look more ... what is the term my granddaughter uses?... ah yes, to look more 'hip' ... then may be, just may be, that may help turn the tide of the market....I commend you Ijuin-san on your brilliant thinking!"  
  
// Brother......don't you know BS when you hear it? Obviously not... // Enzan smiled and said, "Yes well... beautiful NAVI's ... will...uh... only serve to make products even... um... more... beautiful...and beauty... it's just... so... uh.... 'cool' as Netto Hikari likes to say... Now gentlemen, I must take my leave, I have to...uh... re-program my PET. If you will excuse me..." With a polite bow, Enzan turned and all but fled toward the room's exit.  
  
~*****~  
  
Outside the conference room, Enzan leaned against the closed doors, for a moment, to revel in the surrounding peace. He was free, or so he believed, and now his mission was to find a bathroom.  
  
Even the best trained officials eventually fell to "nature's call." Enzan, as elegantly as he could, considering he REALLY had to use the bathroom but didn't want to draw unflattering attention to himself by running, began to make his way to the end of the hallway, where he knew there was a lavatory. // Why do these hallways have to be so damn long?!?!......// the flustered vice president thought to himself. Almost there....  
  
"Ijuin-san!! I need to speak with you!" a voice behind him called.  
  
"Ah Enzan-sama! A moment please!" another voice exclaimed.  
  
"Ijuin-san!" a third voice rang.  
  
// DAMN them all to HELL!!!!!!!...// Enzan turned around, and to his utter dismay, saw a horde of office workers running towards him. "What is it you want?" Enzan asked, barely keeping his temper under control.  
  
"Enzan-sama, you must do something about the color of the new PET. I refuse to use a lavender PET...they're girly looking!"  
  
"Ijuin-san, you must do something about the office seats, they provide no lumbar support and they give wedgies! And another thing!....."  
  
"Bloom won't fight fair! Tell him to stop acting like he is the supreme ruler of the universe!"  
  
"Ijuin-san I need...."  
  
"Enzan-sama all you have to do is...."  
  
"Vice president I want...."  
  
Enzan pressed the palms of his hands to his temples, but the voice of the office workers coalesced around him.....and Enzan Ijuin, a teen known for his infinite patience, had had enough and something inside him snapped.  
  
"SHUT UP YOU WHINY BRATS!!!!" he screamed. "I care for you all dearly, but right now I, want to *ANNIHILATE* every single one of you!!!! Twenty- four/seven, it's nonstop bitching, moaning, whining, complaining, nagging, nit picking about *EVERYTHING*!! Can't you people do anything for yourselves?!?!?!?! And where the HELL is my secretary, what am I paying that woman for!!?!?!?!"  
  
"Sir...." One worker began timidly.  
  
"Excuse me, but *I* am talking here," Enzan snapped, pointing to himself, "who gave you permission to speak?!?!?! Everyone here who has a vice presidential ranking, kindly raise your hand!!!" Enzan paused for a moment, scanning the crowd of frightened office workers. "Ah HA! Only one person here, namely me, so you SHUT UP!"  
  
"I'm sorry sir....are you in a bad mood?....." the worker trailed off.  
  
"OH! You are brilliant; nothing gets by you, does it?!?!? YES I AM IN A VERY BAD MOOD!!!! WHY?!?!? Am I not entitled to *BE* in a bad mood?!! Am I always expected to be patient, calm, and understanding?!?!? You people have a bad mood anytime you like, so WHY CAN'T I????!!!" Enzan raged as the surrounding workers slowly began to back away from him.  
  
"Sir....I-I-I'm so sorry....."  
  
"YE GODS, Get out of my way, all of you!!! I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM!!!!" Enzan pushed past the crowd and stalked toward the bathroom, muttering and ranting to himself, leaving behind a crowd of stunned and speechless subordinates.  
  
~*****~  
  
(Later)  
  
"Enzan-sama?" Blues said peeking around the corner of his PET screen.  
  
Enzan glared at him.  
  
Blues sweatdropped, "Eh heh....I can see you're still upset....."  
  
"Upset?.......UPSET?!" Enzan ranted, "You. Left. Me. You left me! All alone! With them!!! Give me one good reason why I should not put you in the freezer??!"  
  
"............I'm your NAVI and you love me, so please don't delete me?" Blues ventured.  
  
Enzan thunked his head on the table.  
  
"Enzan-sama?"  
  
~*****~  
  
End  
  
~*****~  
  
A/N- LOL! That was unbelievably odd. But incredibly fun to write!! Eh, oh well. Please Review.  
  
(1)- Heero Yuy anyone?  
  
(2)- He has one in Exe  
  
(3) Tais-toi tete de mert (French) -- Shut up you shithead.  
  
(4)Silenzio (Italian)-- Silence  
  
(5)Voce fecha sua boca (Portugeese) Close your mouth  
  
(6)Cierre su boca (Spanish) -- Shut up 


End file.
